I have so many observations, memories, and experiences that I'll always remember about that period in my life. It is so nice to be finished with chemo and radiation. Now, in the aftermath, I meet with the oncologist (every 3 months), the radiologist (every 3 months) and the surgeon (every 6 weeks for awhile) until I get my next instructions. Soon, those meetings will taper off to once every three months, then every 6, then annually.... then 5 years..... remission. :-) Takes 5 years to be in the safe zone. But, in the meantime, I go in about once a month to see one of those 3 doctors. The appointments don't last long. They are usually happy with my progress so far, in this 11 weeks, then they schedule the next one.
I met with the surgeon last week. We are close friends now if you know what I mean since she has intimate knowledge of my most private parts and how they feel and are supposed to feel. She said it will be 6 months before she orders a CT/PET scan. I'm looking forward to seeing that and it should tell the big story of past and present and indicate NED (no evidence of disease). I'm lucky that I didn't have the horrible experience of a lot of people in my same boat. I had a fairly good experience. I often wonder if I'm in denial, or just don't accept pain and suffering afterall.
Speaking of being in the same boat, I always thought I was a whiner about pain, and being sick, but after spending 11 hours in the Hawaiian ocean deep sea sport-fishing a week ago and puking my guts out in front of a group of 5 people all day I guess I can pretty much take anything to get to the prize. I went through 2 week long rounds of chemotherapy and never took one pill or threw up! It took the turbulent Hawaiian ocean to do it to me. It's probably weird that I would analgize (is that a word?) sport-fishing to chemo but the reward was sweet with both. We caught the prized 440 pound blue marlin! And, I'm pretty sure I kicked cancer's ass, literally. So, you see, it's not such a stretch as you'd think.
I sort of compare everything in life to something else in life. It's weird. I'm weird. But with cancer, I was put on board a boat that I didn't pay to ride. And, I feel like it's all working out really well and I got to the end of the day and cured the disease I never knew I had. Like a deep sea sport-fishing you never know if you're coming home with a giant 440 pound Blue Marlin, six 100 pound Ahi, or empty handed. It's all luck, skill, history, and a good captain.
Regarding how I feel, well, I feel great. I don't have any issues at all, I think. It's business as usual. I look for things all the time that might be a little off. Here's what I notice. Doing this treatment put me into menopause. I had my last period on 6/24/2012. I think maybe I have some sweats but not sure. So, maybe it's nothing at all. Super glad not to have periods. Yay me! Then I have a little bit of achiness in my hip and groin area. Is it from the radiation or just the fact I haven't really exercised much for the past 9 months? Hmmmm......not really sure. So any time I go on a hike, or move big stuff around, or yoga, or exert myself in the extra hard way I'm used to doing, I am achy. But, I think that was normal bc (before cancer) too so maybe again, it's nothing. I feel like I didn't complain enough or use my one time "get out of jail free cancer card" while I was going through all that and after. Now, I'm just my normal self again and no one to feel sorry for me. Wah! Just kidding. I'm glad it wasn't too hard. I just hope they gave me enough of a dose that I'm cured. Another thing, I worry about that a little. The fact that my pain and suffering wasn't as severe as a lot of people. That makes me worry. I don't know why. Maybe I should just be grateful. And, I am grateful. I'm going to leave it at that for now. After all, we caught the big fish. The deck hand told me I was magic and probably Nostradamos. That was the first Blue Marlin they've caught in 2012. LOL! Lucky me! Life is full of fun and interesting surprises. You just never know. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Most of all be grateful when the best happens.
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